6 November 2014

These boys are fast creeping their way into my he...aa...rr...t....... I dare you to stare me in the eyes and tell me again that korean songs are rubbish I will unfriend u forever.

Never followed WIN but I stumbled upon this video the other day and things just went downhill from there and I finished Mix & Match in 1.5 days which is rather impressive because that's 300 minutes per day (which also explains why I'm a bit obsessed now and sad that m&m is over SOBSOB).

And then for a whole 2 hours after the last ep today I just sat in lecture and stoned (and eventually slept) because I felt so lost and distracted by the fact that these boys are almost all younger than I am, which got me wondering what the heeellllll I'm doing with my own life.


Not even kidding okay I was legit concerned for myself siGH cliche as it sounds I really really want to be able to do something I love in future and I don't think that is going to be biomedical science-- which is great because at least I've realised that now and not when it's too late. I'm not saying I regret doing biomed; I actually really really like my course but I don't see myself doing it for life (for now at least... I don't know how things are going to change) and to me that's okay.

I just don't even know what I like and what I don't, what I would like as a job and what I want to just be a hobby, and that's what worries me the most I guess...

I know it's a bit early to be worrying about this but for now (right this moment) I feel sad because I've led a rather unaccomplished life. In 19 years I have done almost nothing for myself, I have never experienced what it is like to have a dream I want to chase with all my might, I have nothing for myself and idk I think you should feel quite sad for me too ah...haaa.....

Truthfully there are a lot of things I want to be; I have dreams I've only thought about, but am too scared to pursue because they are rather useless (you can guess what they are aha). I'm starting to think I have TOO MANY and I just can't decide which to focus on hahahahahhaa ok that sucks just as much.


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